Crush Vs. Love: Are Your Feelings Real Or Just Fantasy?
Everyone has their own secrets, and one of them surely includes a teenage crush that we have all had on someone at least once in our lifetime. But once you grow up, you often find yourself asking a question, why do you have romantic feelings for someone you barely know? It might make you puzzled, confused, and unsettled. It is mind boggling experience when the person you think about and have feelings for is your colleague, neighbour, or an acquaintance.
Suddenly, you catch yourself thinking about the person more, feeling an urge to talk or spend more time with them more often, you start to imagine beautiful scenarios with them, and look at them in a special manner. You might be surprised by what is attracting you towards that person, what is so special about them that you cannot stop thinking about them. The truth is, this kind of attraction is a mix of certain emotions, imagination and a sense of feeling such feelings.
Romanticising About Someone You Hardly Know
It might feel very strange to crush over someone you barely know, but here are the reasons behind this happening.
Ideal Projections: You might start imagining the qualities you look for in a person as your “Dream Partner”. Putting in your expectations, and traits you hope they have. This creates a flowery picture which is very unreal.
Mystery: You might feel a pull towards a person you really don't know and make them seem more interesting and you start imagining or idealising them in way which they may not be in real life.
Escape: Sometimes these newfound attractions becomes a source of fantasising about situations that are not real. It is an act of escape or relief from stress or dissatisfactions in other part of life. It is a kind of distraction.
Physical Attraction: Here, biology plays a role. Body language, the way they interact, eye contact, and their aura triggers the release of dopamine that creates excitement and an instant pull.
Traits that are Familiar: Sometimes you might feel an instant pull towards they unconsciously remind you of someone close or a partner from your past. You feel safe and secure.
Hormones: Brain chemicals like dopamine and oxytocin can make you feel mire connected and attracted. It make those people more attractive, charming and you feel a magnetic pull towards them.
Validation: Sometimes having a crush on someone helps in boosting your self-esteem and reassures you about what you desire and choices.
To be honest, these feeling are quite natural, but it often shapes your imagination which is very far from reality and keep you in delusion. Recognising this can help you to keep check on your emotions before you get carried away with it.
Signs You Like Them vs. Signs You Just Like the Idea of Them
It’s not always easy to know if you’re genuinely into someone or just into the version of them your mind has created. Here are some ways to tell the difference:
Signs You Truly Like Them
- You do not get drained when with them, you feel good and energised when with them.
- You would want to know even a small details of their life and about them.
- You are just who you are with them and you don’t have to pretend.
- You anyhow mange time to be with them and enjoy their company.
- You both share same values, hobbies, and interests that helps in strengthening your bond.
- When with them you feel safe, respected and supported.
- You might like their small habits and imperfections. You feel sense of familiarity with them.
Signs You Like the Idea of Them
- You like to interact with them only when you feel lonely and bored.
- Their looks attract you more than their personality.
- You might feel drained after certain point of time and have a feeling of dissatisfaction.
- Your focus is more on whether the like you or not and not on similarities and the bond you share is real or not.
- You are more into imagining them in the way you like the, rather than accepting who they are.
- You are poles apart and your interest and values does not align.
- Fantasising things with them make you ignore their red flags.
Noticing these differences can help you actually know whether you really like them or you just like the idea of being with them.
Final Verdict: What the Blogger Has to Say About it?
This journey will give you a better understanding of who you are and how you present yourself in relationships. In addition to learning new techniques for confidently and honestly expressing your wants, you will learn to identify the patterns that might have been preventing you from moving forward.
Along the process, you will learn practical methods for attracting in the kind of partner that genuinely fits with you and developing the ability to resolve disagreement respectfully and compassionately. Above all, you will exit with new confidence, energy, and passion for establishing genuine, enduring love